GETTING PLAYED: The ultimate guide to a healthy relationship, as the name suggests, is a book about relationships and dating. It is written by former student of the Natinal University of Lesotho (NUL), Mohosho Pofane. You can buy it on the website of the US technology giant, Amazon.
First let’s give you a taste (mofetola).
The book, Pofane said, “was motivated by the fact that what we call dating in the western context, may have a different interpretation in the African context. Here we hardly do dinner dates, movie nights, road trips, etc. Most Africans didn’t grow up in cities where you can just grab a milkshake or some ice cream with your partner after school or work. Our childhoods were not as glamorous where you could just start your car and drive your partner to school.”
And let’s hear from him, in details, word for word.
“Love is a beautiful thing. It’s a risk that most of us take over and over again with the hope of finding the perfect partner with whom we’re willing to spend the rest of our lives. Someone who will make the love journey worthwhile. While we’re searching, we end up in toxic situations, being played or ghosted, as a result, we end up looking at the whole notion of love differently. Some people give in to the cruelty and play the game too, while others keep hoping for a good partner and try over and over again.
It’s often said that the world does not reward those who play by the rules (which is arguably true), so wouldn’t it be great if we knew the difference between people who come to us to play and those who come with genuinely good intentions?
We all know the feeling of being played in dating. You were misled by someone who seemed to be into you. There were no warning signs that someone was about to flip the script and just as you were letting your guard down, starting to get excited about the promise of a long-term relationship, the person you were dating flakes. They pull away. They dump you. They ghost you. At the end of the day leaving you feeling like a fool for believing in something that was not real.
The book was motivated by the fact that what we call dating in the western context, may have a different interpretation in the African context. Here we hardly do dinner dates, movie nights, road trips, etc. Most Africans didn’t grow up in cities where you can just grab a milkshake or some ice cream with your partner after school or work. Our childhoods were not as glamorous where you could just start your car and drive your partner to school.
The point I’m making is that we may not be as romantic as we think we are, or whatever it is that we do in the name of love, may not be romance at all. As a country, we couldn’t even utilize and sustain a movie theater for 5 years. American textbooks on relationships & dating talk about romance in the context of ‘American’ life.
They have no regard for our own class culture of romance as African people. As a result, I went out of my way to write about Dating & Relationships in the context of our own culture, as Africans and as the citizens of Lesotho.
Boasting with chapters like The psychology of players, Why people get played, How to play a player into a serious relationship, and The notion of a side-chick: Getting Played will teach you everything you need to know to avoid getting your heart broken. The book does not only address players but it also touches on general dating, which eliminates the perception that it only speaks to women and girls.
I have had gents complain that my book gives the game away, the same gents who have scores of female best friends that they discuss everything about relationships with daily, from dating advice to lying about other gents with the hope that at one point they’ll get their chances with those women. My book is a different best-friend because it has no personal agenda.
If you’re looking for anything to get you through the financial and emotional drain of the lockdown, or a present for your partner this valentine’s day, GETTING PLAYED is your option. After all, a chapter a day keeps insanity at bay!
The book is available on Amazon and Kindle Store as an ebook and paperback for $4.99 and $29.00. It will soon be available at local and South African bookstores.
Anyone can get a copy from me at +266 59555318. Promotional copies sell at M120 for the first 50 signed copies and the book will go back to its original M150.00 price thereafter.
Amazon link: https://www.amazon.com/…/ref=cm_sw_r_cp_awdb_t1_CZO…